Sunday, July 09, 2006

Real Red State Religion

Today's newspaper in Lexington, KY is dominated by not one, but two reports from the Nike All-America Camp. The Nike and Adidas camps serve the crucial functions of introducing new cult figures into Kentucky's most important religion--basketball. Hundreds of thousands of Kentucky basketball fans have been learning ab out Patrick Patterson, Jai Lucas, and Delvin Roe. We already knew about O. J. Mayo from his years in Kentucky.

Ann Coulter mocks liberalism by calling it a religion, but calling basketball the number 1 religion in Kentucky is only being realistic. Any Baptist ministers worth his salt would trade his eternal salvation for one percent of the devotion, fervor, and sense of mystery attached to Kentucky basketball.

Among the Red States, Kentucky and North Carolina are unique for putting most of their religious feeling into basketball. Football rules in Florida, Alabama, Tennessee, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Arizona, Colorado, Nebraska, and Kansas.

Even though we are monumental in our religiosity, it is absurd to refer to the Red States as Christian. We're all pagans intently focused on the local divinities.

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