Monday, March 05, 2007

Bedtime with Dick Cheney

Ever since Dick Cheney was attacked in Afghanistan, there have been a lot of reports about people on the left who would rather see Dick Cheney dead.

I don't believe it.

My left-wing friends and I bear bear nothing but good will toward the greatest vice-president since Al Gore. In fact, we at Red State Impressions are so concerned about Cheney's health that I flew to Washington personally to tuck him into bed and read him a story tonight. Here's some lines I read from the children's classic, Margaret Wise Brown's "Good Night Moon."

Good Night Moon
In the great green room
There was a telephone
And a red balloon
And a picture of--
The cow jumping over the moon
And there were three little bears sitting on chairs
And two little kittens
And a pair of mittens
And a little toy house
And a young mouse
And a comb and a brush and a bowl full of mush
And a quiet old lady who was whispering "hush."

I told the Vice-President that I would be reading "Winken, Blinken, and Nod" tomorrow night, but he preferred "The Three Little Pigs" instead. It's one of his favorites.

If anyone has a bedtime story that they want me to read Dick Cheney, please reply below.

RSI

1 comment:

Chef Rick Paul said...

When thinking of the figureheads of our two national parties, I'm always reminded of two things. The first, a quote from Ralph Nader during the 2000 election, where he became the first politician I had any personal stake in, charging that our two parties...

"...have mutated into one two-headed monster, wearing different makeup... the quintessential hermaphrodite of American politics--a 'Republicrat."

The second is a favorite rhyme from my childhood, "The Duel," by Eugene Field:

The gingham dog and the calico cat, Side by side on the table sat;
'Twas half-past twelve, and (what do you think!), Nor one nor t'other had slept a wink!
The old Dutch clock and the Chinese plate, Appeared to know as sure as fate
There was going to be a terrible spat.
(I wasn't there; I simply state, What was told to me by the Chinese plate!)

The gingham dog went " Bow-wow-wow!" And the calico cat replied "Me-ow!"
The air was littered, in an hour or so, With bits of gingham and calico,
While the old Dutch clock on the chimney place, Up with it hands before its face,
For it always dreaded a family row!
(Now mind: I'm only telling you, What the old Dutch clock declares is true!)

The Chinese plate looked very blue, And wailed, "Oh dear! What shall we do!"
But the gingham dog and the calico cat, Wallowed this way and tumbled that,
Employing every tooth and claw, In the awfullest way you ever saw-
And oh! how the gingham and calico flew!
(Don't fancy I exaggerate! I got my news from the Chinese plate!)

Next morning where the two had sat, They found no trace of dog or cat;
And some folks think unto this day, That burglars stole the pair away!
But the truth about the cat and pup, Is this: they ate each other up!
Now what do you really think of that!
(The old Dutch clock, it told me so, And that is how I came to know.)

I'd like to think Cheney would hear these words for what they are. But I would love it even more if he would then turn around and explain those words to the fanatics of both parties. Or are these the words of a remorseful moderate?