The Unofficial John McCain Campaign Song

One of my ideas for the campaign is to make suggestions about how John McCain can goof his campaign as badly as George McGovern blew it in 1972.

After all, if McCain's going to lose, he might as well lose big time.

So far, my suggestions have been limited to nominating really bad vice-presidential candidates like Karl Rove or Rudy Giuliani.

Today, I'd like to propose a tune that John could adopt as his campaign song. It's bold. It's brash. It also has the kind of not-so-deeply-embedded drug message that only John McCain would have the guts to adopt.

The John McCain Campaign Song
To the tune of Casey Jones (with major apologies to the Grateful Dead and their fans)

Flying that plane, high on McCain,
Hey Big John, you’d better watch your speed.
Flip flops ahead, no money behind,
And you know that notion just crossed his mind.

Running for office takes all his time,
Straight Talk Express leaves at quarter to nine,
Flying to Baghdad, St. Louis too
At a quarter to ten you know he’s flying again.

Flying that plane, high on McCain,
Hey Big John, you’d better watch your speed.
Recession ahead, failed war behind,
And you know that notion just crossed his mind.

Trouble ahead, there's crowded air space,
Deregulation ain't always so safe,
Pilots are Sleeping, Green Airline 02 is
in the wrong quadrant, now he's heading for you.

Flying that plane, high on McCain,
Hey Big John, you’d better watch your speed.
Obama’s ahead, bad poll numbers behind,
And you know that notion just crossed his mind.

Trouble with you is the trouble with me,
Big John’s flying but he still don’t see.
Too many townhalls, you know its the end,
John's down in a cornfield, straight-talkin' while dead

Flying that plane, high on McCain,
Hey Big John, you’d better watch your speed.
Flip flops ahead, no money behind,
And you know that notion just crossed his mind.

And you know that notion just crossed his mind.